it's a wrap!

just another manic monday…

Archive for May, 2012


我覺得太少了 .




one good leg

I didn’t remember the last time I sprained my leg. Now that tells me that I haven’t been exercising enough over the years, doesn’t it? Shucks!

The last time I did was when I was quite little. I vaguely remember sitting/lazing in my grandmother’s lazy chair, all bandaged up, treated like royalty, by grandma! Best of all, no school and television watching the whole day. That got old pretty fast but I enjoyed it while it lasted. Ha!

This time around, the experience woke me up to facts that I take for granted every day.

Every time I put one foot in front of the other without the sharp searing pain shooting up my leg, that is what I take for granted.

Every time I walk, I walk without a limp, that’s what I take for granted.

Every time my feet sync themselves smoothly in motions, walking, jumping, tip toeing, hopping, running, that’s what I take for granted.

Every time I feel my feet skimming the ground as my feet worked themselves in a run, that’s what I take for granted.

Every time I cross the road in a minute, that’s what I take for granted.

Every time I stretch luxuriously, without the pain crawling up my tendons, that’s what I take for granted.

On an absolutely unrelated note,

“Alcohol can be used to preserve many things, Dignity isn’t one of them”


I chanced upon an old folder in my email. In it was a collection of old emails and instant messaging histories. I went through them one by one.

They were conversations and communications between a guy I had a crush on and I. I used to call him Doc.

To be honest I cannot remember the context in which the nickname came about. Some of the things made me laugh, some of them made tears roll down my cheeks, some made me wonder if things had been different, some just made me marvel at youth.

I had forgotten that I read the book King Arthur, I just don’t remember, but apparently I did, according to those emails. I did find out that I was interested in taking photographs even from then though. At least that was not a passing phase with me! Ha!

I was reading about me in another time. How time molds and shapes one. I could scarcely recognize the person who wrote those emails, who communicated to the guy in that manner. But I read the fun and hope between those lines. The hope of youth, the wishful thinking that, maybe, one day…and I’m glad that nobody chose to burst my bubble then.

My hopes would’ve been quite dashed had I know what  I knew today.

He’s married and a dad now. I think we would have nothing much to say to each other even if we manage to meet and catch up. After all he knew the younger version of me, and I knew the pre-married life of him.

Maybe one day we will. Well, I hope we will.

i must have written about this before

God is too great to be mistaken; God is too good to be unkind. When you don’t understand, when you don’t see His plan, when you can’t trace His hand, trust His heart”

I must have written something on this before. There were so many incidents in my life that I must have depended on the essence of this saying just to get me through the day, maybe some nights too.

When I questioned my own sanity, when I teetered on the brink of despair, when the waves threaten to engulf me, when the darkness of the cave threaten to swallow me whole.

When I held on by a breath.

Maybe the only assurance that I have in the world of uncertainty.

I have someone whose heart I can trust.

喝杯茶, 吃個包

On a sunny Friday morning, I’m sitting here drinking tea, eating a bun. Somehow that doesn’t quite convey the full essence of the meaning when said in English as opposed to saying it in Chinese. I want to say like I’m relaxed, laid back, all prepared to welcome the weekend, and just sipping my tea and nibbling dainty morsels of cha siew, with it’s chewy outerwear.

Oh well, I’m glad it’s the starting of the weekend. The kind where one just goes with the flow. I sort of know what I have to do over the weekend. But not restricted by time.

There’s a place for a productive weekend where everything is planned to a T, appointments are made to the minute and things get accomplished. Satisfaction at the end of the weekend.

Then there’s a place for the other kind of weekend. It’s vague. Plans are made for lunch but no specific time set. A call when one wakes up. I might go run an errand or service the car impromptu. Maybe even paint for a bit if time permits.

Which kind of weekend do I prefer? Maybe the latter most of the time, with the former just to break the routine once in awhile.